Monday, November 23, 2015

Sometimes you need the Technology

He knew it was murder, but he carried on , almost huffing and puffing like the big bad wolf. Ok HE was an honest, not a piglet eating man ,while the wolf was not. 
You hardly needed to be a Technocrat to figure that out. 
Niceness and a love for humanity and human food showed in his jiggling Beer Belly.
And the colour choice of his windcheater. Neon Green.
And that by the way was forced on him by his daughter. Mr Huffing and Puffing Wolf had never,ever worn this colour.
No sir he had not.
Neither had he ever sported a hook shaped ear piece.
He was smart in a non smartphone way. After all, phones were invented to talk and his standard cheap stubby keypad phone did just that.
But no, his credit card swiping daughter had to buy him this super expensive,as big as his hand, Androgynous Android brick type phone. 
And it was an Indian Micromax!
Why not imported?
He was the one who was footing the bill....
He was old school and face it,he couldn't read without his specs.
And then suddenly,something spoke to him.
Voices from the depths of the phone!
"Stride Faster Dude!"
Ok he was not Luke Skywalker the last time he checked!
He pulled the abomination out of his pockets and saw a few ripples of light floating on the screen of his phone.
And it was asking him or rather commanding him to stride faster.
Yo!This was not an elliptical machine. It was plain mother -freakishly solid -earth.
And now there was this red and green phone icon things bleeping. Ok, he was not so daft that he couldn't figure out that green meant go. Swipe across,she said...
"Daddy? Why are you not running? "
"Because you called!" Teenagers really needed things to be spelt out to them, most of the time.
"How many steps have you walked? Did you check the pedometer?"
"Did you check the Apps for the calories burnt? Daddy , what's it's you? The phone has all that info about the exercises you need to do....and I'm tracking your running route."
That's why he never joined the army. He never wanted robe tracked...
So he replied to his almost mum daughter with an accent similar to hers, "Whatever,"
And tapped the end sign.
He was not going to be slave to his supposedly smartphone.
And he trudged along, watching the cell towers dwindling and the 2G ,3G and 4G signs jump around in the topmost layer...
And he saw this geeky guy sitting at the chai shop,replete with his headphones and glasses and eyes that didn't blink in all the 20 seconds he stared at him.
He tiptoed slowly towards him and as his beer belly knocked on the geeks shoulder,he saw a speck of the Jedi.
Another Star Wars nerd.
And then he shook the geek out of his stupor...
"Hello there? Jedi? You're watching a movie on your phone?"
The poor geek seemed as inept at social nicities as he was at handling technology.
What could you expect of this Technocratic generation?
"Yo Unkil...." (Sounded like a Uncle-to be fair)
"Can I watch too?"
"Sure, but your phone is better than mine is ... Why don't you see on yours? Ah you don't know how to ...uh? No worry ,I'll show you,"
So he showed me... "Tap this, feed this number, now write this, enter this money from your credit card... And watch!" 
I could do this forever.
So now that  my "Jedi" had taught me...

And wished that "May the Force be with you," ,I'm going to put,y new smartphone to good use and be incredibly smarter.
And my message to you "Use the Phone Dude!"

This is not an ode to the Star Wars movie franchise. 
Don't get me wrong dude , but if you haven't seen any of the movies,or for that matter any other iconic movie with super special brilliant SFX ,YOU NEED TO USE your 4G streaming and Qualcomm Snapdragon Octacore processor powered SMARTPHONE to do it. And if you own any of the latest flagship offerings from MICROMAX , Pop your corn and enjoy them light sabres .

You need to see them .
Now. And enjoy the brilliance of technology with my Cosmic Brownies.

So what are you watching today???

Tuesday, November 17, 2015

Cosmic Brownies and a taste of Lusciousness

"Mithai for Diwali?"
"Please! We've had more than enough."
"No please..."
Ok then suit yourself.
I packaged Cosmic Brownies and bode them goodwill.

Ok...And it was accepted with open arms and waiting appetites.
Whoever tasted the, fell in love with them.
I make many,many different types of brownies,but these were truly cosmic and ethereal in nature.
Modelled After Little Debbie's Cosmic Brownies, they were absolutely amazing.
Sticky ,fudge-y ,chocolate-y, heavenly...just yum.

And so simple even a teenager can bake them.
As long as there is love..these are amazing.

All you need is some patience and a lot of chocolate.

For the 

Cosmic Brownies and a taste of Lusciousness 

You need

1 1/2 cups flour
1 tbsp cornstarch or cornflour (or even brown and poison or wekfield custard powder-vanilla flavoured )
1/2 tsp baking powder
Pinch salt if not using salted butter 
1/2 cup cocoa powder
1 2/3 cups sugar brown if you have it - you can reduce the sugar by a spoon or two -I did
1 1/2 cups or170 GMs butter 
3 tbsp whole milk
2 eggs
2 tsp vanilla or rum

For the chocolate topping-this is enough to last for some frosting and some bowl licking 
400 GMs dark chocolate or 200 GMs dark and 200 GMs milk chocolate 
200 GMs cream -used Amul cream
1 tbsp butter
Sprinkles or candy sprinkles 

Start by sifting the dry stuff together to remove lumps from cocoa. Mix well and set aside.
Start your oven to 175C OR 350F and prepare your tray.

You need a 9 by 13 inch tray. Mine is a 11 by 13 inch tray, so I improvised a bit. Lined it with baking paper and placed a foil leaf to act as an edge. The next lot I baked, I multiplied the entire ingredients list by 1.5 and never bothered with any improvisation. So if you have an 11by 13 inch tray as is available in India, I'll add the multiplied list of ingredients at the bottom of the blog post. Not a math teachers on a sabbatical for nothing.

Ok stand mixer on. In with the sugar and softened butter and whisked for a while for the butter to become pale yellow.
Add one egg at a time, whisk. Add essence or rum.
Then add flour mix in three bits, alternating with the milk.

Bring out the mix. It'll be like a ganache,so you'll need to spread it out with a spatula and dip the spatula in warm water and spread again. 
Just like , frosting.
Pop the tray in for about 30 minutes.
Turn it around once. You may need to check the centre, it should be just about done. Not dry and cracked from the top.
Make the ganache.
In a bowl, add the chopped chocolate and cream and butter and pop into the microwave. Power medium on 30 second bursts.
Keep stirring, keep stirring...
Till its smooth and done.
Cool a bit and slather on the brownie tray.
Sprinkles on and cool till you need to serve.
With a long butcher type knife cut out 2 inch squares.
Place on cupcake liners and pack.
Or serve.
Or just eat.

Festivals are times when you don't next o bother.
You can live to gym again another day.
Till then, eat chocolate.

Just in case you were wondering,I found this recipe here .

Some of these went as Diwali gifts, some well...didn't last as long.
But they sure bought light into our chocolate starved life.

After all that's what festivals are for.
And happiness.

May the chocolate be with you.

So what are you baking today???

You need for the multiplication by 1.5

2 1/4cups flour
1.5 tbsp cornstarch or cornflour (or even brown and poison or wekfield custard powder-vanilla flavoured )
3/4 tsp baking powder
Pinch salt if not using salted butter 
3/4 cup cocoa powder
2 1/4 cups sugar brown if you have it - you can reduce the sugar by a spoon or two -I did
2 1/2 cups or 250 GMs butter 
4.5 tbsp whole milk
3 eggs
3 tsp vanilla or rum

So now you are good to go. Cheers!!! Allow happiness in the form of cosmic brownies into your life.

Until the next

Until the next


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